Wednesday, June 15, 2016

It's Not a Diet

To be honest with you, I've been really resistant to "dieting" as an adult.  I went to my first Weight Watchers meeting when I was in junior high and I've been fat my whole life.  After years of dieting and exercising, with the only result being disappointment, I decided to stop counting calories and just listen to my body. I am a firm believer in the Health at Every Size Movement, because I believe that some of us just have bigger bodies and it's not because we're lazy or we secretly eat pounds of candy when no one is looking. 

So making a change like moving to a paleo lifestyle, even though it's not technically a diet plan, was a big decision for me.  Publicly pursuing weight loss brings back a lot of painful memories and it makes me feel like I have less agency over my own body.  I don't like people commenting on my weight loss, or offering advice.  I don't like people telling me how much better I look, because it makes me sensitive about how I looked before. It's one of those things where I desperately want people to notice a change, but I dread it at the same time.  It's complicated.

Even before I began, I ate more healthfully than most of the people I know, no fast food, limited desserts and alcohol, so when people start offering advice about things I already do (and probably more faithfully than them) it makes me crazy. I've known for years that the reason some people get fat and others don't had to be much more than a simple calories in/calories out breakdown. This paleo lifestyle is just proof.